Low self-esteem - I swear I'd get a lot more accomplished in life if I didn't feel so crappy about not believing in myself more?
Having worked in human services for more than a decade, I have become quite familiar with many of the issues that are currently "plaguing" our society -- depression, drugs, teen pregnancy, violence, sexual assaults, prostitution, STDs, high dropout rates, unhealthy relationships.
Luckily, according to many experts in the field, the solution to all of these problems is simple -- kids just need to feel better about themselves.
First of all, I absolutely hate when people make negative generalizations about young people - as if they are the only ones who hate their bodies, have relationships that don't last as long as they had expected or make choices for themselves that may not prioritize their own personal well-being. These things aren't unique to teens, it just may be that we find it easier to identify and criticize teens because their lives are often more exposed than the adults that we know.
All of us are vulnerable to negative messages about ourselves. And all of us, young and old, would benefit from learning skills that would help us to fend off some of the negativity with which we find ourselves surrounded. However, we need to stop expecting that any of us can accomplish the herculean task of having a positive thought about ourselves without generating alternative messages to inform our perspectives. Instead of teaching about sex by focusing only on regrets and negative consequences, teach about the positive aspects of sexual expression too - that it can feel good, help you feel close to another person, help you learn about your body, your interests, your personal limits. Instead of teaching about relationships by focusing only on how to identify and avoid abuse, to anticipate and cope with loss, to be assertive and learn to say no, also teach people how to safely be vulnerable with one another, how to communicate effectively, how to manage emotions and express them in creative ways.
I hate how easy it is for those of us who are tackling these incredibly complex issues, to so conveniently reduce it to an issue like poor self-esteem, without factoring in the real forces that contribute to the issues (poverty, discrimination, poor education, lack of access to resources and services...) To me it's like blindfolding a young woman and putting her on the 16th floor of a building with no smoke alarms, no telephones, no electricity or running water and where the doors to the stairwells are locked, setting the building on fire and then commenting after her death what a shame it was she didn't believe in herself enough to get out of the building safely.
Posted by Jenn on March 27, 2006 1:51 PM
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